the helplessness of being alive

FIC: "Like Twins" (Ats, Fred, Illyria)

2009-05-30T21:19:12Z

Title: Like Twins
Fandom: Ats
Character/Pairing: Fred, Illyria
Genre: Dark
Rating: PG
Warnings (highlight to see): **electrical shocks, big gross Pylean demons, scary/sad situations**
Disclaimer
Summary: Fred and Illyria are like twins now.
Word Count: 950
X-Posted: joss_las, TBA
Beta: Unbeta'd

A/N: Originally posted here for joss_las. It's 19 drabbles of 50 words each - not 100, because they're kind of like pairs. Although the last one isn't paired. Oops. :D

I'm actually really proud of myself for this one - mostly because it was very, very difficult for me to manage to write in 50 word sections. It was like drabbles on speed. But at the same time, it felt more comfortable than an actual drabble for me, because I got to continue the story past 100 words. So it's like a baby step.

And, OMG, no one voted for me as the least favorite! I'm ridiculously happy about that. ^-^

Plus, first Fred and first Illyria fics. And second Ats fic. Woot.

( Like Twins )

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FIC: "A Tale" (BtVS, Dawn, Andrew)

2009-05-24T20:17:40Z

Title: A Tale of Tragically Star-Crossed Lovers Separated by the Mortal Coil Itself
Fandom: BtVS
Character/Pairing: Dawn, Andrew
Genre: Crack, Humor, Friendship
Rating: PG
Warnings (highlight to see): **swearing, teasing, complete crack**
Disclaimer
Summary: Andrew tells the tale of the love between Spike and Xander. Dawn is a bit skeptical.
Word Count: 863
X-Posted: TBA
Beta: Unbeta'd

A/N: The title in the subject line is shortened only because if I put the full one in, it and the fandom/characters wouldn't fit. XD

This is for deird1's birthday. I got it in on time - in her time zone, too, I think! I only managed by shortening it a great deal, though - I found that the rest of the plot was dragging and I wasn't really able to get it together. I might eventually do sequels if there's enough interest in me and others.

So happy birthday, deird1! Maybe next year I can managed Dawn/Andrew, but for now you get friendship.

Oh, and just so you don't get immediately turned off - the first part is meant to be badly written. Hopefully you guys would recognize that I don't actually write that bad.

( A Tale of Tragically Star-Crossed Lovers Separated by the Mortal Coil Itself )

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Open Letter: An Apology

2009-05-23T18:03:17Z

Dear Anyone Who I've Recently Talked To,

I owe you an apology.

I've got a problem. I know it. It's deep, and psychological, and twisted, and I do realize this. I'm sure you've noticed it when I talk to you - through posts, comments, replies, emails.

But I can't help it. It's just something that comes out, regardless of how many times I vow to myself that it won't. I'm sure it will still come through in my replies to comments on this post.

Of course, you all know what it is, but I'll type it out loud, just to recognize my problem:

I overuse emoticons.

Yes, I'm sure you've seen it - every sentence seems to be followed by a ':D' or ':P' or 'XD'. Sometimes the old classics '*g*' or ':)' will come into play. And I preclude most sentences with an 'LOL'.

The effects of my problem are devastating. I annoy all who I come into contact with, I stop comment threads in their tracks, I get defriended by the bushel.

So if you've rolled your eyes at one too many a 'Heh.' or 'Hee!', now is your chance.

Speak up. Let me know that it fucking pisses you off.

Maybe, one day, it will make a difference.

For now, keep me in your prayers, with the knowledge that I desperately need your help.

And thank you for managing to keep reading my entries, despite this obviously terrible problem.

Love,
Lily

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RL & Lurkers

2009-05-20T17:33:23Z

In RL news, deird1 is a rotten buttface who gave me a cold.

What, you say? It's not possible to spread germs from Australia to the States through the Internet? LIES, I TELL YOU.

Anyways, I feel like shit. I'm kinda dizzy, and my head hurts, and my throat's sore, and when I talk I sound like I ate a pound of gravel and then vomited it back up. And my nose is all stuffed up, which leads to coughing and earaches and phlegm going down my throat.

So, yeah. Not the best of times.

/whining

It does mean I get to sit around on the Internet for long periods of time. That's kind of a win.

And in COMPLETELY UNRELATED NEWS, kitty_poker has suggested the wonderful idea of a Lurkers Day!

This means that anyone who lurks about can feel free to stop by and say hi - in case the reason you lurk is cause you're shy, or you don't feel like you have anything important to say.

And if you're not a lurker, I encourage you to do something similar on your journal - it seems like great fun to me.

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MEME: Favorite Fic

2009-05-13T00:14:54Z

Stolen from velvetwhip because memes can be fun. Obvs no pressure to answer or do it yourself, cause I don't work like that.

Basically, leave a comment telling me what your favorite fan fic (include ALL your favs if you want or just pick one) that I have written is/are and why. Then post this at your journal (if you write fan fic), so I can tell you about my favorite of yours.

ALSO ALSO ALSO OMGZ UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE!!!!

I GOT AN IDEA FOR joss_las!! YESSSSS!

BITCHES.

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META: Titles

2009-05-13T00:10:16Z

This just randomly popped into my head; roll with it or don't.

( Fucking cut better fucking work, or I'ma beat the shit out of someone )

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OMGZ, inspiration needed

2009-05-11T23:47:55Z

So I signed up for joss_las. That's a good thing, right?

Sort of. Turns out I am drawing SUCH A HUGE FRIGGING BLANK on what to write for the prompt 'Darkness'. I have oodles of plot bunnies lying around, I know, but most are either too long/involved for this amount of time, or not dark, or just not really any good.

Soooooo...

...if anyone would be so kind as to suggest any sort of combination of a pairing, a character, a word or phrase, a line of dialogue - anything you want, as much or little as you want.

Obviously no promises on whether it gets used, but I'll be sure to credit you as a prompter. :D

And even if it doesn't get used this time, perhaps it will spark another plot bunny or comm entry. Not that I really need more of those right now. *headdesk*

GOT AN IDEA! YESSSSS!

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RECAP: "Omega" 1x12 (Dollhouse)

2009-05-09T19:53:26Z

Oh.
My.
God.

OMIGOD.

( Spoilers behind the cut! )

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Layout: Dreamwidth policies and new header quote!

2009-05-07T13:03:29Z

I have a new header quote. I think it's rather pretty. :D

And! Andandand! Dreamwidth had originally announced that it hadn't meant to give free users custom layout option, so it was going to take it away, although they were very sorry to be all tease-like.

But now they're letting free users have limited custom layout options, because people really wanted it! You can make one custom layout with 5 different layers.

This is very good personally, because it means I'll still be able to turn Mixit styles into DW layouts like I did for this one.

And it's also good for the site, because it shows that they are willing to rethink their policies and listen to user feedback.

So, yay!

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Random animal stuff!

2009-05-04T23:58:56Z

FOLLOWING LINK TRAILS IS FUN.

Cause what do you find? FUN CRAP LIKE THIS THAT'S WHAT. SO FUN IT'S MAKING ME GO ALL CAPSLOCK IN YOUR BUSINESS.

Here, I'll outline the trail: I clicked on the link in LJ spotlight to kawaii_not, which had a link to the Kawaii Not, which had a link at the top to Uglorable, which I click on cause it's the best word ever, I'm pretty sure.

And then what do I find in the Highest Rated sidebar? ONLY THE COOLEST SHIT EVAR.

It's an obscure animal alphabet, with all sorts of unusual and hilariously amazing looking animals.

( Here is a pic of one--just kidding, I can't get the DW image insert to work )

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LAYOUT: Thanks to others, now it's pretty!

2009-05-02T20:14:36Z

It's pretty now! It's pretty now! Yay!

Thanks to snowpuppies, who directed me to this tutorial at thefulcrum on turning Mixit layouts into DW layouts. It's very easy, even for someone as technologically challenged as me, and only requires some copy and pasting steps, and some clicky. But it's all helpfully explained and screenshot-ed.

I highly recommend it to people who want a pretty DW layout but don't want to wait for ones to be made. You can even choose from the Mixit styles over at thefulcrum!

Now it looks pretty! And the links list isn't all over the bottom someplace! I'm rather excited, in case you can't tell!!!!! XD

& btw, anyone know how to link to LJ users/comms on here? I tried the LJ user = thing you do on LJ, but that just gives you a DW user. *pout* Got it! Thanks, Snowy!

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RECAP: 1x11, "Briar Rose" (Dollhouse)

2009-05-02T19:38:57Z

I know, I know. What is this recap-posting Lily is doing?

I haven't posted one since Man on the Street. I've never had time to do it right after I watch, and then I'd get too lazy to do it the next day. BUT I think this episode was the best yet, full of crazy-ass surprises and general awesome-ness.

Spoilers through "Briar Rose", but none for the promo.

X-posted to dollverse, dollhouse_tv, blank_dolls

Here's my thoughts, in no particular coherence or order:

1) I think Mellie was a bit too histrionic - it felt awkward and weird. I'm not sure if she was supposed to seem fake or not, and it just felt off.

2) Paul was at his creepiest - which I loved. This ep really dug into how disturbing he really is, I think; only wanting to save Caroline and not caring about anyone else, how he was convinced that Dolls were just brainwashed and that he could snap her out of it, his absolute and disturbing vehemence about going through with it, his "IT'S WRONG" stance, the looks on his face when he was fighting Boyd, the look on his face when he thinks he's going to save Caroline.

It all made things even more morally gray; as in, who's really right here, is Paul the good guy or not? I love how everyone's pretty much on the same level - no one gets to be heroic or demonic, there are no winners or losers, none of that crap.

3) I thought the Briar Rose/Sleeping Beauty parallel was absolutely wonderful. They could have gone more subtle with it in places, but that was just a minor thing. It emphasized through the whole fairy-tale-moral-absolute thing just how fucked up the sitch was, especially Paul, and it was tied-in in lots of nice places, like with Alpha and the girl (Susan). It also gave the ep just this really nice aesthetic feel - I can't describe it, but I loved it.

And am I the only one who noticed that Susan's position at the beginning of on of the scenes looked EXACTLY like Caroline in one of her talk-to-Adelle-signing-up-shots? With the head down and in her hand and looking at the table and the hair kind of in her face?

4) The engagement with the little girl was absolutely ADORABLE. I actually almost started crying the second time I watched, when Echo was saying the stuff about being a victim and all. It was all very inspiring and cute and nice. And I thought it raised some VERY interesting points about consent with the Dolls; if the message is that it's not Susan's fault for being raped (which is OBVS true in that sitch), then applying the message to the Dolls...does that mean it's not their fault for anything they do when they're at the Dollhouse and not sentient, even though they signed up for it?

It also raised a question in my mind - how would you feel about having your body used, with your knowledge, for humanitarian/"good" purposes like this particular engagement, if you were certain it would only be for those purposes? Would you let them do it so you could forget and so you could help others, or would it still be a violation of your body? I'm personally not sure, but I think it's an interesting question. I love how much this ep made me think, really.

5) Alan Tudyk? Is the bomb. I've only seen him as Walsh, and he totally broke out of that mold for me as pothead/evil genius. I love how he switched so convincingly between them, and how he totally convinced me with his pothead act that he wasn't Alpha. I'd heard rumor that he was, but I was so drawn into his performance that I just assumed it was another casting switch, and I was legitimately surprised when Claire called him Alpha.

As the pothead, he was pretty much adorable. I loved his whole 'carrot plantation' thing, the way he talked, his interactions with Paul.

And am I the only one who immediately thought 'buttsex' when he was in that awkward position when he fell into Paul's arms?

...my slash goggles are permanently on, no joke. Like when Paul brought the Active over and asked him to take off his clothes, instead of thinking that he was going to use them as a disguise, my immediate thought was, "WAIT WHY IS PAUL RAPING THIS ACTIVE WTF." XD

As Alpha, he was absolutely CREEPY and wonderful. I'm so excited for what's going to happen with him in the next ep, it's not even funny.

6) Claire and Victor both gave adorable and "I want to hug you!" performances with the scared-of-Alpha stuff.

7) Sierra was SO SEXY in her suit thing, and being all smart. Rawr. I am possibly even more in love with her than with Eliza. Cause, damn. THAT GIRL IS FINE. :P

8) The Boyd and Ballard fight scene was so intense. Damn, I loved it.

9) Echo's whole remembering thing was nice. I liked that, yupyup.

10) Victor being Laurence, Adelle being Adelle.

11) Oh! How could I forget? Topher and Ivy's scene totally made me ship them, or at least unrequited Ivy love for him. It also humanized him even more for me - I don't see how people could possibly hate him after this ep, with that and his upsettedness at returned-from-the-Attic!Laurence.

12) The suspense. I CANNOT WAIT for the next ep. I am sooo effing excited, no lie.

Which is why I ask you to please not spoil it for me, kay? Thanks.

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Dreamwidth Conversion: Pretty Much Complete

2009-05-02T18:56:20Z

So I've made it over to Dreamwidth! Wanna hear how, in my inaugural DW post, which also serves as my test post for the LJ crosspost feature????

Well, then...

( ...you're in luck! )

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